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Thursday, September 23, 2004

Women

"Women should not see themselves as being weaker or lacking capability as compared against the men. Most of the time, weakness come from self-assumption and attitude, which prevent women from fully utilising their talents and skills."

-- Wanita Umno Chief Datuk Seri Rafidah Aziz

The quote above is today's quote of the day of www.bernama.com.my. It captured me in a sense that i know and i believe that many women in Malaysia feel the same way too. However, most of them are just too afraid to put it in action. Or lack of support, i presume.

I recall one incident.. I was a bridesmaid for my good fren who got married last month. A flowerlady (err.. she's not the senior version of flower girl, she provided flowers for the bride's room and pelamin) innocently tried to give the bride a piece of advice (apparently, to me too) while we were waiting for the groom to come for akad nikah. She told us; ladies' rule-of-thumb: "be dependant on your husband, so that he will always remember you" Which means, DO NOT do anything that is not in the bracket of housewife chores. Not even changing bulbs, nor rearrange stuff in the house eg. table. Even though you are capable of doing it on your own. Just pretend that you dont know. Whatever happens, wait for him and ask him to do it for you or do it together. By doing this, your spouse will always worry about you, thinks of you, whatever he does, where ever he goes.

My bride-fren and i were like, "What???" Hello!!! What era does she lives in? I'm not married but i personally do not think that's how it should be. It should be based on understanding and respect to each other. Not clinging!! Zaman dulu-dulu boleh la kot, where girls were so naive and all they knew, is to breed and cook and wash for the family.

I like to see myself as one of the women, just like Datuk Seri Rafidah. I always wanted to believe that i'm independent and strong. But i know i cant't be that, not without support from my love ones. I dont say to be stronger than men, but i just want to be a stronger self, a better person each day. I dont compare myself with other people. I compare me with myself yesterday.

i do suggest that women should stand beside a man, not behind. And men should do likewise. Thus, i disagree with the quote "In every man's success, there's a women behind him"

"In every man's success, there's a women beside him" and vice versa.